Coby Levit’s Beard Gets in Fight With Donald Trump’s Toupee, Wins

Donald+Trumps+toupee+challenges+Levits+beard+in+a+speech+late+last+month.+%28Antonio+Perez%2FChicago+Tribune%2FTNS%29

TNS

Donald Trump’s toupee challenges Levit’s beard in a speech late last month. (Antonio Perez/Chicago Tribune/TNS)

For months now, Coby Levit’s beard and Donald Trump’s toupee have been insulting each other, nearly getting in a fistfight about a month ago. But ever since the second GOP debate, Trump’s toupee has been far more insulting, often angrily tweeting about Levit’s beard two or three times a day.

Levit and his beard, as we all know, do not generally respond to these hateful messages.

This bad blood (or rather, bad hair), is reported to have started earlier in the summer, when Levit’s beard was a newly emerging star. In late August, Forbes Magazine produced an article titled, “top 100 hairstyles and facial hair,” listing Levit’s beard as #1, pushing Trump’s toupee out of the top spot for the first time in 8 years.

Many of Trump’s Toupee’s speeches have been on this very subject. On September 15th, for instance, Trump’s toupee, acting independently from Mr. Trump, gave a speech at the Ronald Reagan Library.

“I’m gonna build a wall to keep Levit out of this country, and trust me, no one builds a wall better than me,” the toupee quipped.

Trump’s toupee ended its speech by challenging Levit’s beard to a fistfight. On Tuesday, Levit’s Beard finally gave in, accepting the challenge, leaving Coby’s face and meeting the toupee “out by the dumpster” at 3 p.m.

In one punch, the toupee was knocked out. Trump’s polling numbers, as surprisingly as ever, have not dropped since.